How to close the family ministry feedback loop
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Be encouraged to reach out to the families at your church for feedback, to help equip them for continued home discipleship.
‘Unprecedented’ is certainly the most accurate, albeit overused, word to describe our lived experience in the first half of 2020.
For those of us in ministry, the second most frequently used word might be ‘pivot,’ describing how we have responded to the challenges presented by COVID-19. Once the opportunity of running our regular ministry programs was taken away from us, it was the perfect opportunity to ‘pivot’ our ministry practice to help parents foster faith in the home.
But what did this look like in practice and how effective was it? To find out, Youthworks surveyed several ministry leaders about their experiences during lockdown. As the responses came through, we have been encouraged to hear that equipping parents for home discipleship has indeed been an area of ministry that leaders have prioritised during this time.
For those who identified as primarily working in children’s ministry, 39% answered that producing resources for families to use at home was the most effective ministry activity that they enacted during the lockdown season. This was followed by producing online content (19%) and running video conference gatherings for children (14%) [1].
There were other encouraging signs that children’s ministry leaders were highly engaged in effective, family equipping ministry.
58% of children’s ministry responders agreed or strongly agreed that they are confident asking parents to disciple their own children
77% said that they have had either ‘significantly more’ or ‘somewhat more’ communication with families during this time
90% agreed or strongly agreed that resourcing families has become a high priority
87% are satisfied or very satisfied with the feedback that they had received from families
However, one question stood out in contrast to these other responses. When ministers were asked if their parents were using the resources that they were providing, here was the response:
The fact that approximately two-thirds of parents are using the home resources ‘a lot’ or ‘a little’ is not all that surprising, nor particularly concerning. Many families, including my own, were overwhelmed with the barrage of changes being brought from the sudden disruptions to our regular lives. Between working from home, children learning from home, churching from home, not to mention the pressures of reduced work hours and trying to source enough food and toiletry essentials to keep the household running, the fact that parents somewhat engaged with our home discipleship resources is a great win.
What is interesting from these results is that almost a quarter (23%) of children’s ministry leaders ‘don’t know’ if the resources that they are preparing and delivering to families are being used.
While it can be hard to hear feedback, especially on projects that you have invested time, energy and creativity into, receiving constructive feedback is essential to improve and enhance your ministry. We need to close the feedback loop.
For those of us who have invested in home discipleship resources, we need to reach out to parents, hear how they are coping, learn what they have and haven’t been using, and investigate how you can continue to minister to and support them as families in the future.
As we return to face-to-face ministry, my hope is that we will not neglect the home discipleship resources that we have found so effective during this time. But, to provide resources that families both value and use we will need to know how families are using the material that we are currently providing.
Here are four ways to close the feedback loop on our family ministry resources:
1. Call or visit individual families
This is the most direct path to hearing back from parents. Calling each individual family allows you to hear directly from them how they are going, what have been the wins and losses for them recently, and how you can continue to support them as you begin to relaunch face-to-face ministries.
The strength of this approach is the direct pastoral connection with each family. The greatest deficiency is the time that it will take, depending on the size of your church. It can also be a daunting prospect if you have not yet established a culture of making pastoral phone calls to parents.
2. Parent survey
A less personal but still effective approach is to send out a parent survey. This is a great way to receive a lot of responses in a short amount of time. With any survey, the balance is between asking enough questions to get meaningful information and not making the survey too long. Five to ten questions should be plenty to find out what resources families have been using, how frequently and whether they have found them beneficial for the faith development of their children.
3. Parent Forum
As churches cautiously move back to physical gatherings, there may be a chance to gather the parents together. The great strength of a parent forum is the opportunity to communicate the vision and values of your children’s ministry whilst explaining how equipping parents for home discipleship aligns with your theological convictions. It also provides you with the opportunity to hear questions and concerns from parents in a group setting.
This option can also be quite daunting, especially if it is a new idea for your church. Having your senior pastor or other senior ministry team member co-hosting the event with you can provide the support you need to facilitate these forums well.
4. Leverage Engaged Parents
As you seek to support and encourage parents in the discipleship of their own children, one of your best resources is other parents in the congregation. You will probably be aware of some families in your church that are already doing home discipleship well. Asking them how they are going, interviewing them in church, and asking them to call other parents in the congregation are just a few ways that you can leverage their maturity in influencing effective change in other families in your church.
It has been wonderful to see so many children’s ministries ‘pivot’ towards equipping parents for home discipleship during this time. Be encouraged to seek out feedback for your parents to hear how they have been going and then continue to tweak your family equipping ministry as part of your ongoing preparation to relaunch face-to-face ministries well.
[1] Note that the question asked them to identify the most effective activity. It doesn’t mean that these ministry leaders were not engaged in the other activities, just that in their opinion the one selected was most effective in their context. A number of those who answered ‘other’ made the comment that there was no one most effective practice, but the careful combination of approaches is what has worked for them.
If you would like to think further about equipping your church’s families in the discipleship of their own children, consider talking with Youthworks about training options for your church. There are training courses for children’s and youth ministry leaders, as well as for families, which will continue to establish effective family ministry in your local context.
